Car Accident on Conant Street

 about an open wound that has since healed due to the writing of this piece.

CAR ACCIDENT ON CONANT STREET

it was cold out but we

were so

warm.

we’d just gotten back from the roller skating rink 

drifting then stumbling,

our collisions emitted sparks like scraping steel

and left black scratched dents along our sides 

that we were eager to mend.

we laid there still,

on gymnastics mats that turned into glue traps if you laid there long enough.

there all night,

awake.

i didn't want to sleep.

my vision was painted in a blurred wash of watering eyes.

it was like rain over porous stone,

the tool of my sight was quick to soak up any soiled cloud of crocodile tears brought upon it.

i felt the weight of my head lighten as it drained down my throat and siphoned into the reservoir of my chest,

a deep echoing quarry that yearned for anything to fill it.

there'd been a body asleep next to us and another on the bed, lids hardly lifted,

too entranced by the flashing sequin lights on the TV

to realize

your hand on my face.

your hand that you ran over painted brick walls, 

unwashed red railings, 

your hand that braced you 

against the scuffed wooden floors

scarred by surfing wheels

you now

ran over my face.

like tire marks,

like a hit and run,

skin against skin was more like metal against metal.

an uncomfortable, unnatural sight

but one you can't seem to pull your eyes away from.

you want put yourself in my shoes,

imagine my pain,

imagine the comfortability of it.

you wonder if it's something you get accustomed to.

the dent in the fender,

the hardly lit headlight…

before it turns to a crack in the windshield,

a dragging bumper,

or vitals exposed and smoking…

before it turns unavoidable,

enveloping.

you've enveloped me.

now imagine that.

a name wrapped around your brain,

squeezing tight until pink becomes purple.

tugging on the tendrils of your eardrums 

until its vowels are the only letters 

you can pluck from every sentence

you could possibly comprehend.

i listen for a mention of you,

and then i choke on it.